For many years, I carried the weight of anxiety, depression, and chronic fatigue. I pushed through, doing my best to cope and keep going. On the outside, everything looked fine, but inside, I was exhausted from the constant battle with my own mind.

For much of my life, I believed the narrative I’d heard growing up, “I was an idiot,” “I was stupid, “ “I would never amount to anything,” “there is nothing special about you.” It seemed to me that I simply wasn’t meant to succeed.Deep down, I had accepted the idea that I would never amount to much — that there was nothing special about me and that my efforts would always fall short.

Looking back now, I can see how those beliefs shaped my life. Whenever things began to go well, I somehow managed to sabotage my own progress. No matter how hard I tried to “get ahead,” I seemed to undo any success I created. At the time, I didn’t realise these patterns were being driven by deeply rooted beliefs held in my subconscious mind.

By the age of 55, I was completely exhausted. Years of battling with myself had taken their toll, and life felt like a constant struggle.

Then something happened that changed everything.

After a skiing accident, I experienced what I can only describe as a near-death experience. In that moment, something profound shifted within me. It brought a clarity and understanding about myself — and about life — that I had never experienced before.

For the first time, I could see how much of my life had been shaped by the beliefs that were never truly mine to begin with; they belonged to someone else born in a time before I even arrived on the planet.

In that moment, I found my freedom.

That experience set me on a path to understand the mind, the subconscious, and how the beliefs we carry shape the lives we experience.